Why Your Thoughts Matter: Reframing Negative Thoughts

We all experience moments when our minds seem to turn against us—whether it’s that nagging voice saying “You’ll never get this right” or the overwhelming sense that “Nothing ever goes my way.” These negative thoughts are powerful, shaping how we see ourselves, others, and the world around us.

In Why Has No One Told Me This Before?, Dr. Julie Smith explains that these thoughts often stem from cognitive distortions—automatic patterns of thinking that distort reality. These distortions can make challenges feel insurmountable, fuel anxiety, and hold us back from reaching our potential. But the good news is, with awareness and practice, we can reframe these thoughts and regain control over our mindset.

Understanding Cognitive Distortions

Cognitive distortions are sneaky. They show up in many forms, such as:

• All-or-Nothing Thinking: Viewing things in black-and-white terms. For example, “If I don’t succeed at this, I’m a complete failure.”
• Catastrophising: Expecting the worst-case scenario. “If I make one mistake, everything will fall apart.”
• Overgeneralising: Drawing broad conclusions from a single event. “I messed up once, so I’ll mess up every time.”

When we let these distorted thoughts run the show, they create unnecessary stress and can cloud our ability to see things clearly.

The Power of Reframing

The key to overcoming cognitive distortions lies in reframing—challenging the negative thought and replacing it with a more balanced, realistic one. This process doesn’t mean denying the difficulty of a situation, but rather gaining a healthier perspective that opens up new possibilities.

For example, if you’re thinking, “I failed that presentation, so I’m terrible at public speaking,” challenge it: Is this really true? Is there evidence that you’ve succeeded in other presentations, or that you’re improving?

A reframed thought might be: “I had a rough presentation today, but it’s an opportunity to learn and improve for next time.”

Reframing shifts your mind away from extremes and invites more flexibility, which reduces stress and helps you tackle challenges with confidence.

Practical Steps for Reframing Negative Thoughts

1. Notice the Thought: Pay attention to when a negative thought creeps in, especially when you’re feeling anxious or down. It can be helpful to ask yourself: Is this thought based on fact or assumption?
2. Challenge the Distortion: Once you’ve identified the distortion, challenge it. Ask, What evidence do I have for and against this thought? For example, if you’re catastrophising, ask yourself: What are the chances that the worst-case scenario will really happen?
3. Reframe the Thought: Finally, replace the negative thought with a more balanced one. Instead of “I’ll never get this right,” reframe it to, “I’m learning, and improvement takes time.”

Using the Journal to Support Reframing

As you start noticing and reframing your negative thoughts, keeping track of them in your journal is a powerful way to reinforce this practice. Writing them down not only helps you identify patterns but also lets you see your progress over time.

When a cognitive distortion comes up, try noting it in your journal—what was the thought? How did you challenge it? What new perspective did you adopt? Over time, you’ll see how reframing becomes more natural and how it positively impacts your mindset.

Our journal isn’t just about recording your day; it’s a tool for actively engaging with your thoughts and emotions, helping you build habits that foster resilience and self-compassion. By writing down your reframed thoughts, you’re reinforcing healthier thinking patterns that lead to greater mental clarity and well-being.

A New Way of Thinking

Reframing negative thoughts is a skill—one that takes time, but brings significant rewards. By recognising when cognitive distortions are at play and practising the art of reframing, you can transform the way you approach challenges, reduce unnecessary stress, and build a mindset that supports your growth.

As you move through this week, remember: the way you think shapes the way you live. Take the time to challenge your thoughts, and notice the difference it makes. And don’t forget—your journal is there to help you along the way, offering space to reflect, reframe, and grow.